Swings and roundabouts
by ButtonsMagoo
Summary: Vince desides to change his looks dye his hair, but of course things are bound to go wrong, terribly wrong.


Hello

**Hello. Now before you say it, I know I should be updating 'The Brother and Sister ****chronicles****' I will! I promise! But this idea came to me after I had my own little 'disaster' today and was also inspired by an MSN conversation I had with Radar-rox :D Enjoy.**

**Disclaimers – You know I don't own the boosh, but as a fan fiction I own this piece of writing!**

Vince bounded into the flat, a Superdrug carrier bag in hand. Howard sighed.

"_More_ makeup?" Vince shook his head, he sat down on the sofa untied his yellow converse and threw them across the room, one of which hit a week old can of coke of the shelf it had so merrily been sat on into the bin. 'Nice shot' he thought to himself.

"Go on then." Howard said, his voice slightly curious combined with boredom.

"What?" Vince asked, he'd totally forgotten the carrier bag and its contents and was already reading Dazed and confused.

"What's in the bag?"

"Oh, yeah," He said, putting the magazine and delving deep into the carrier and pulling out a box, a woman on front with way too much too much makeup on for Howard's liking, he liked simple looking girls, plain girls, girls like Mrs. Gideon.. ' I wonder how she is' he thought to himself before re directing his attention back to Vince and the box.

"What's that?" He asked, looking at it as though it where a deadly snake.

"Hair dye!" Vince exclaimed, tearing open the box and pulling out two tubes, a bottle and some instructions, those he threw to one side. "Won't need those."

" No sir! No way!" Howard said, standing up and backing away from Vince and the dye.

"What?"

"You're not doing your midnight barbering on me with that! No way!" He shouted.

"I'm not you northern pillock, dying my hair 'gonna go bleach blonde bit of a change don't you think?" Vince said holding up the colour chart to his head and pouting.

"Oh, well that's good then as long as you're not using it on me! Yeah it should look really nice!" Howard said, uninterestedly. Vince smiled and jumped out of his seat and dived for the bathroom. Howard picked up Vince's magazine that had been idly thrown onto the floor, he placed it on the table and looked around, his gaze drawn straight across to the bin where the coke can had only moments ago been knocked into, Howard picked up a pillow and aimed for another can hoping to at least nock it off the windowsill, he missed completely and knocked a vase off the shelf. 'Shit'

Howard was bored, how long did it honestly take to dye your hair, this was an all time new for Vince, he ventured over to the bathroom door and he heard nothing coming from behind.

"Vince?" He asked.

"Go away." He said bluntly, Howard tried again.

"Vince?" and again all he got was 'go away' Howard sighed.

"Come on Vince you've been in there for six hours, surely your hungry and besides I need a piss."

"Well you'll have to wait, because I'm not coming out, not ever!" He shouted, Howard heard a bang, it was the side of the bath plastic popping out off place. He left it and walked into the kitchen making a Bovril hoola hoop sandwich, the fridge was empty.

Almost an hour later, Vince still in the bathroom, Naboo and Bollo came back from their latest mission; Tony Harrison's papoose strap had broken and they had to go down to mother care and get him a new one.

"Alright Howard, where's Vince?" Naboo asked, putting the kettle on.

"In the bathroom, he's been in there seven hours now, god only knows what he's doing now, surely his hair dye would've done by now." Howard said, standing up from the kitchen table and dunking his plate in the soapy water in the sink.

"Hair dye? Bollo, go break down the bathroom door, Howard bring the camera." Naboo ordered a wide grin on his face.

"Why?" Howard asked.

"Just do it."

Howard brought the camera, a classic Polaroid (Vince insisted that that had that rather than a digital because it was retro) and took it to the bathroom door, where Bollo and Naboo where standing.

"C'mon Vince open the door!" Naboo shouted.

"No!" was his reply, he sounded like a five year old.

"Okay then, Bollo."  
"BOLLO?" he screeched as the door was smashed to bits by the gorilla, Howard, Naboo and Bollo laughed at the sight that they saw before them, Vince's hair dye had gone wrong, really wrong, his head was hung in embarrassment; his head now a shocking, almost neon orange. Howard grabbed the camera.

"Vince?" He asked, Vince looked up and Howard snapped the picture.

"HOWARD!" He screamed, chasing Him out of the bathroom and all around the flat in desperation to get the picture off him.

"Bollo, nip down boots and get a black hair dye." Naboo said handing Bollo five euros, sniggering.

Three weeks later.

"I still cannot believe you put that picture up all around Camden that was cruel." Vince said, his hair now back to black.

"Yeah, well – Oh no! Who did the washing, my corduroys have shrunk!" Howard moaned pulling out a beige pair of trousers, now only good for a four year old with stick thin legs. Vince snickered.

"Swings and roundabouts Howard, swings and roundabouts."

"You bitch!" Howard shouted, throwing the trousers down and reducing Vince to a heap on the floor in a fit of giggles, he was very ticklish.

**:D My hair disaster wasn't as bad as that but similar I was meant to have blonde streaks put in my hair and ended up with orange LOL aww well.**


End file.
